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Revitalize your Relationship

With your partner. With yourself. With the world around you.

 

Therapy Is A Unique Relationship

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The relationship we create together in therapy is special for many reasons.

 

This relationship is about you. It is a place for you to have space to show up in ways that may feel uncomfortable or unavailable in other relationships. It is a place for you to be seen in your entirety. Even the parts of you that may stay hidden from others. Together we can explore your present and your past to uncover the blueprint for how you relate to everything and everyone in your life.

 

Through our work together, my hope is to support you in becoming more deeply connected to your preferred self. I hope to empower you to be that person in our relationship and with your partner. I will invite you to take risks and “try on” new ways of being in our sessions. I will be a real person on this journey with you and offer honest feedback about how I experience you in your growth process.

 

Change is hard! If this were easy, you wouldn’t be here.

 

My role as a therapist is to create a space that feels safe enough for you to step out of your comfort zone. No matter which version of you shows up to a session, I will meet you with acceptance and empathy. When you feel stuck or uncertain, I offer curiosity – never pressure. When you see positive change, I will celebrate with you.

 

Relationship Therapy for Couples and Individuals

Relationships Are Where Growth Happens

Humans are pack animals. We depend on our relationships to survive.

 

Relationships have an enormous capacity for healing and transformation. This is a fundamental part of being human and is at the heart of my approach as a therapist.

 

Whether you seek therapy individually or as part of a couple, the way you relate to yourself, your world, and your people are pivotal to understanding your mental health.

 

Strong relationships make us feel connected and secure. We know where we belong. We feel a sense of meaning and purpose.

 

When we feel stuck, disconnected, depressed, or anxious; exploring our relationships can shed light on how these issues arose and how they became a part of our larger life narrative.

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Our Relationships Define Us

Our earliest relationships in childhood gave meaning and helped us understand our world. They provided a blueprint for where we belong and what we can expect from others. Caregiving relationships were our source of basic human needs for safety, love, belonging, and acceptance.

 

Our success in meeting these needs instills lasting beliefs about our worthiness of love and the capacity for relationships to be safe and trustworthy. In the absence of secure relationships, we find strategies to find safety and meet our needs in other ways.

 

Each of us brings our own blueprint of beliefs and expectations into every relationship we have. We interpret every interaction through this lens, and it becomes part of our greater story of who we are.

How Relationships Get Stuck

Relationships get stuck when partners lose their ability to resolve differences on their own.

 

Couples seek therapy for many reasons. It is very normal to face differences in values, love languages, needs, and goals.

 

The issues that brought you here in search of support are unique to you and your partner. However, the problem that all couples in your position share is this:

 

“When we try to talk about it, our communication breaks down and it feels like we are adversaries – rather than a team.”

 

Relationships become stuck when partners fall into a pattern of communication that feels unsafe. This pattern becomes “the problem” that prevents ordinary differences from finding compromise or resolution.

 

The way we interpret and make meaning of our lives is not a process we are very aware of. We rarely recognize how these beliefs influence our behavior. Instead, we notice when we act and react in ways that feel misaligned with our preferred self or what we want. This can be confusing and frustrating!

 

Relationships get stuck when our blueprints of belief cause us to interpret our partner’s actions as a sign of threat. When we perceive danger in our relationship, we use our own strategies to protect ourselves, seek safety, and self-soothe. When our partners perceive our protection as a threat of its own, we begin a cycle of defensive reactions that can feel explosive and impossible to stop.

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Therapy Can Help

Do you feel caught in old, unwanted patterns?

 

Maybe you know what you would like to be different but haven’t been able to create that change on your own.

 

Or perhaps, you only know that things don’t feel “right” but it’s hard to pinpoint exactly why.

 

Is your relationship with your partner feeling less intimate than when it started?

 

Has communication become challenging in conversations that used to be easier?

 

Do breakdowns in communication leave you feeling more like adversaries than partners?

 

Perhaps there are important conversations that you are now avoiding for fear of falling into conflict and never reaching a resolution.

 

Maybe your relationship has endured infidelity or other painful events in the past, and you are struggling to return to a place of trust and safety together.

 

I am committed to working with humans at all levels of development who need a nurturing and supportive environment in their pursuit of growth and healing. No matter the shape our relationship takes, I can promise authenticity and honesty as we explore your inner and outer worlds together.

 

Above all else, I am guided by one principle: All of your feelings are real and make sense. Let’s discover how together. Therapy offers a unique opportunity to make connections and build a new understanding of the why behind patterns and behaviors that can sometimes feel confusing or out of our control. Change happens when we learn to understand ourselves deeply and can carry that awareness into the present moment.

 

With awareness comes choice.

Book a Free Consultation Today

Contact Me

Paul Taruskin, LMFT (he/him)

Licenced Marriage and Family Therapist 131393

2340 Ward St. Suite 204 Berkeley, CA

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